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Sunday 27 April 2014

My Skin

I get it. We're all different. My body and brain will never function like the person next to me or someone a thousand miles away, for that matter. Not even twins.

But no-one can safely say,"I feel 100% confident and comfortable in my own skin!" because there has always been that one time where you think 'Aw, I wish I could run as fast as her,'  or 'If only I knew how to do pre-calculus as well as him!' 

I think that in this day and age everybody has some sort of mental anxiety about wanting to be a better version of themselves, either for their own well-being and self-esteem, or to make others feel proud of them. Whatever the reason, we all experience this kind of self doubt. However, some people can overcome that feeling of self-doubt very easily and just totally feel comfortable about who they are and who they want to be.

Others, not so. For me, I have people around me every day that love and care for me, so I don't really feel that constant nagging in my brain as much. But, of course, it's still very much there and exists in my brain. I'm not saying that I doubt myself or how I look, I'm just implying that I don't really feel like I'm exactly comfortable about who I am. It isn't totally about how I look, I just think that I could be such a better person. Everyone knows that there's one wonderful, kind, big-hearted girl in the grade who is just plain nice no matter what. And sometimes I think, 'How on earth do they keep all that anger and hatred all in?' 

Being nice was kind of my 2014 personal goal (that I didn't tell anyone...) But it wasn't really that general. It was more to listen to others more and accept me for just being me. It was also to stop ignoring all the negative thoughts that lurk in my brain and instead focus on the constant love and support my family gives to me. The biggest part though was trying to keep everything in. I'm generally silent around people I just met, but most of my friends know I like to let it all out. Yep, so I'm also on the road to stop swearing -.-

Just a little ramble to let it all out and not scream at myself in bed...

Image from weheartit.com

Stay you. Stay awesome.

1 comment:

  1. Love the new look. Been a while since I was here. Loved this post. You want to know a scary thing? I will turn 40 next month and I still don't feel comfortable in my skin. I think that is just the way we are wired. We learn, we grow, we experience different things and try to make sense of it all.

    All I know is that you are pretty well-put together at 13. Keep doing whatever you are doing.

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